Tuesday, November 10, 2015

like e.e. cummings - no capitals

i am continuously surprised when paralells appear in my life and i wonder what i am supposed to learn from these experiences. someone/s coming into my life and acting out things with me that i am quite certain played out some years ago with someone i used to know. am i being called to change the script? where is the lesson? what is the lesson? is the lesson for me or the other/s involved or all? it is a great way for the universe to get my attention, but to what end? for what purpose am i being called? until i figure it out, i believe these parallels will continue to show themselves to me.


as i sit here in a cluttered catastraphe of a home, i want to grab trash and recycling bins and rid myself of all of it, but i live with others and this isn't possible. i dont want it to look like a magazine, just nicely, lightly lived in instead of... this... 

for so many reasons, all of which are good for the whole family, we have hired a mothers helper to come in 4-6 hours a week. This will allow me to get homework done, work on my book, tidy the house without interrupting the children's play time, our family weekends, or my sleep.  last week was the first week of this. it was good, but i can't help but feel a bit guilty. my sister who is a mother of five and has had mothers helpers since number 2 came along has informed my that there is "noguilt allowed on that front' and still it nags at me a bit. Yet, my mother's helper will return on thursday and friday this week. i will give it a good month to six weeks and see how it all plays out.

i have set a new goal for finishing writing the book: January 2015
the semester ends mid-december. 
instead of taking an accelerated class in january, i am taking two accelerated classes in the spring - one for the first 8 weeks and another for the next 8 weeks. 
there is no excuse for not finishing this book by the end of January.
i can do this.
oh, and the two classes i am taking in spring semester are online courses: the art and craft of short fiction (all creative writing) and short fiction (all reading and analyzing short fiction).
exciting and a bit intimidating.



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“Learning without thought is labor lost; and thought without learning is perilous.” - Confucious